Complaining is draining

Previously published as Baby Step #38 from my Fall into Better Habits series

Complaining is draining.

There are few things that energetically suck you dry quicker than complaining. Why? Read on.

(#feeling drained?) image courtesy of Unsplash

Here’s my take on the subject:

When we tell someone how we feel in the hopes of improving a situation, that’s a discussion. Even if an agreement is not reached the first time, at least we’re in the process of achieving a mutually-beneficial outcome. We’re seeking connection. And, we feel a sense of hope.

When we tell someone about the same problems we have over and over and over and over again without any desire to change the situation for the better, then that’s complaining. We’re seeking sympathy rather than seeking a solution. And, we feel a sense of anger, hurt and resentment every time it's brought up...which is usually a lot.

Complaining gives us the illusion of making progress. In actuality, it keeps us trapped in some fantasy world where everything and everyone is intent on making our lives miserable. Even though that’s not true, it can feel that way since we keep complaining about it, which means it’s kept at the forefront of our minds.

Complaining is our brain’s way of making sense of something we are currently unable to accept…like feeling hurt by someone we love and trust.

I know you want to fix things.

I know you want to repair the damage.

I know you want love, peace and harmony in all your relationships.

I know you want others to love, appreciate and respect you in direct proportion to how much you love, appreciate and respect them.

And, I’d love to tell you a quick and easy way to do all that. Unfortunately, humans are quirky, unpredictable creatures who rarely address a situation without allowing their wide range of emotions to haphazardly rule their actions.

Complaining - giving it or receiving it - drains the life force from us because we were not designed to hold onto negative vibes.

(#remember you are Divine) image courtesy of Unsplash

What were we designed to do instead?

Thank the people who sing our praises. Learn from the people who point out our faults.

Because there will always be some of both in our lives. And, to help make sense of it all, I like to imagine myself in a scenario with the person whom I’m challenged by. It would go something like this:

We’re relaxing on a cloud in Heaven. An angel drops by and inquires, “Would you guys like to pop down to Earth for a short visit? It’s a pretty sweet assignment! I thought of you first because you two are so close.”

Us: “YES! Sounds like fun!”

Me: “I’m so glad we get to stick together.”

Them: “Me, too. Just remember, it says here in the assignment that I’m supposed to annoy you until you become enlightened. And, I’ve heard those human brains are forgetful and stubborn. So, don’t shoot the messenger. Promise not to forget how much I love you?”

Me: “I promise. I won’t forget.”

Well, I forgot.

And enlightenment doesn’t come cheap.

(#light bulb moment) image courtesy of Unsplash

BABY STEP

So, how will I remember that in the future? Let’s take a look at today’s Baby Step for guidance:

Step 1 - DO

What can I do right now to start the process of becoming an even better version of MYSELF? Repeat every morning.

Step 2 - SAY

I love myself enough to let this go because it is far more important for me to remain at peace. Repeat every night before bed.

Step 3 - REMEMBER

I absolutely, positively know the Universe will take care of the rest. Repeat every chance you get.